You could be having a fantastic day; the sun is out, your loving your outfit, and really feeling yourself, and then all of a sudden one comment can turn that all around. I heard something the other day from someone; that one comment either positive or negative could have a big impact on someone’s entire day.
We all run into negativity, whether it be on social media, from a friend, a random person in Starbucks or from your Aunt who is brutally honest and loves to point out everything she feels is wrong with you.
Sometimes these people don’t realize what they said is rude. Especially during this time of the year, you are often forced to see many friends and family, some of which you rather not! For me I of course get many negative comments online since I put my life out there. I can easily just delete the comments or block the person #BYE
Unfortunately, you can’t block people in real life which makes it a bit more difficult.
So, my main tips? I have a few that will hopefully help you out.
My main tip would be CLARIFICATION! Literally ask “what did you mean by that?” when someone makes a comment that you feel was hurtful. Many times, we think more critically about ourselves than others do, and we assume that what they said was meant to be hurtful when in reality we actually interpreted it the wrong way. Asking the person to clarify will ensure that there is no miscommunication and will put them on the spot to give you an answer of what they meant by their comment. Perhaps they meant something totally different than what you initially heard.
Release Your Inner Badass
If they DID make a rude comment on purpose then stand up for yourself! I know this can be difficult but let them know what they said is not okay with you. You don’t have to be combative but do let them know that what they said was inappropriate. Hopefully in the future they will think twice since they know they won’t get away with this type of behavior with you. People like to pray on the weak and those who they feel they can walk all over. So, let them know that -ish doesn’t fly with you
Speaking from a Place of “I”
Lastly, speak from a place of “I”. Saying “I felt hurt when you said this” is a non-confrontational way of expressing yourself. Phrasing it like this instead of “You made you did this” allows you to tell them how you felt in that moment without putting blame on them and turning it into a full-fledged argument.
Overall you need to do what is best for you! If these tactics don’t seem to make a difference in the situation then you probably just have a toxic person on your hands. In that case you might need to ignore and co exist for the time being until your both able to work together on a solution.